In which The Gay Recluse rejoices over the end of gentrification in Washington Heights.

Rejoice, kind and courageous foes of gentrification! For those many of you who have added your voice to the cause — i.e., our allies in lower Manhattan, Brooklyn and other gentrified neighborhoods around the city who have never ceased to warn us of the evils of gentrification as you have experienced it firsthand —  we have some very good news! The O.C. Bakery and Cafe has been permanently shuttered and sealed shut, no less than if it had been deposited into a casket and buried a proverbial six feet under! Gentrification is officially over in Washington Heights, or at least the southern portion of it served by this incendiary little upstart.

Horrible, evil gentrifiers take note! Should you sail your commercial ship across the turbulent waters of uptown Manhattan, you can expect to receive the same merciless — but frankly deserved — treatment as the O.C. Bakery and Cafe, which as we wrote last fall had the utter temerity to open a coffee shop that sold fresh bread and delicious desserts baked daily by a Paris-trained Moroccan pastry chef. Imagine the gall it took to open a new business on Edgecombe Avenue and 159th Street where patrons could idly linger for hours at outdoor tables under a rainbow-colored umbrella — and we know what that attracts! —  where they could take in the lovely views of the lower stretches of Highbridge Park! Or how dare they open a second branch in that shitty little retail space across from the Grinnell, where nothing has ever lasted more than six months! Obviously, one doesn’t reverse thousands of years of history with a few lattes and and a bread-basket of good intentions!

But thankfully, the nightmare is over. Both branches of the O.C. are dead and gone, and — even better! — have been replaced by nothing. Rejoice not only in the sight of the vacant storefront below, but also in the vision of the many sad and unworthy souls left to listlessly wander about in a daze, futilely scouring the streets of Washington Heights for what we do not deserve.   

The O.C. Bakery and Cafe in May, 2008: Thankfully, the nightmare of fresh bread and coffee for this stretch of Washington Heights is over. Let’s hope a similar fate awaits other evil enterprises to the north and south.  

The O.C. in September, 2007: A meeting place for all sorts of troublemakers.