In which The Gay Recluse is still voting for Obama.

He’s not Janice Dickinson, but whatevs — did he not promise to mandate Sunday bagpipe maneuvers in the park?

Let us now make clear our one non-negotiable demand: henceforth we will limit our support of presidential candidates to those who promise — upon assuming the office — to mandate the playing of bagpipes at the entrance to our favorite park each Sunday afternoon. Candidates, take heed! Do not take this lightly! Of all the demands we have made — marriage equality, environmental protections, universal healthcare, improved public transportation, redistribution of wealth — this is the one you should approach most carefully, for we would never be willing to negotiate or “water-down” its essence.

–The Gay Recluse, January, 2008