On The Jessica Watch: No Surprise, Upper East Side Proves To Be Conservative and Judgmental
In which The Gay Recluse contemplates human conception from a safe distance.
Today we introduce our newest correspondent The Jessica Watch, who has expressed a willingness to satisfy our admittedly
perverse voyeuristic impulses and keep us apprised as she moves ever closer to having a kid. TJW reports:
I just had a barrage of tests, all completed very successfully. I’m not sure I like one of my doctors, though, so I might be shopping around. I originally thought that it was a good sign that my doctor was at a tony Upper East Side address with a penthouse (although at the same time I was a little concerned: do you have to be really sick or really rich to ride the elevator all the way to the top?) but it turns out that with the tony address came a conservative and unhelpful attitude toward my unconventional plans.
For your consideration, I’ve attached pictures of:
* the sign from the elevator at the tony UES medical building:
This elevator is admittedly nice, but is it a little too nice? We’ll have to stay tuned.
* a picture of the street tree in front of my house that the city has been promising to replace since August 2005 when it fell against the house when my landlords and I were on vacation (well, separate vacations at the same time). I took it as a good sign of fertility and general good baby-making luck that the Parks Department finally replaced it on the day of my first appointment with my obstetrician.
We agree: that’s a good omen, TJW! (Hmm…what kind of tree is that?)
* a picture of the 59th street bridge because I too love bridges and I want to track the bridge through the seasons because my visits will span (no pun intended!) at least a year.
Cool shot, TJW! We don’t trust anyone who doesn’t like
Thanks for that awesome report, TJW! Between babies, bridges and Brooklyn, you covered a LOT of ground! Needless to say, we’re happy that everything’s in good working order and we look forward to future updates. (Especially if a sperm bank is involved!?) As for today’s news, although we’re hardly surprised to find out that the UES doctor was conservative and unhelpful, we remain curious about exactly how he or she was conservative and unhelpful. (Nothing too graphic, please — we’re very squeamish!)
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Tags: 59th Street Bridge, Asshole Doctors, Babies, Conception, Kids, Obstetrician, Parks Department, Penthouse, Single Moms, The Jessica Watch, Trees, Upper East Side