In which The Gay Recluse scores selected opinion pieces in The Times.

Gail Collins/The Uncle Al Election

The Short Version: Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama are politicians; ergo they act like politicians.

In her words: “There isn’t a right or wrong to this argument — only strategy.”

Score: A- (Aware)
Although we’re not always in love with Collins’ somewhat precious sense of humor, it cannot be denied that she has emerged as a voice of reason in the Hillary-Barack battle. We, too, prefer Obama, but think that Democrats need to remember that either candidate would be 1,000,000,000,000,000 (one trillion) times better than George Bush & Co, not to mention The Maverick.

Nicholas Kristof/Obama, Clinton — And Echoes of Nader?

The Short Version: Hillary Clinton should stop being such a naughty little girl.

In his words: “All this means that Mrs. Clinton’s chances of winning are negligible, barring some major development.”

The Score: F (Failure)
Kristof basically presents a Yahoo news item about the math of superdelegates favoring Obama and then unveils the shocking conclusion that if Clinton doesn’t withdraw, she might — zomg! — be the new Nader. It’s becoming increasingly apparent to us that the op-ed writers on The Times don’t read each other’s pieces as a rule, because this is basically a tepid rehash of Frank Rich’s column from Sunday, but done in Kristof’s typically sanctimonious prose. Yuck.