In which The Gay Recluse scores selected opinion pieces in The Times.

Nicholas Kristof/Obama and the Bigots

The Short Version: We must teach people not to be such crazy losers.

In his words: “Likewise, with countless people today spreading scurrilous rumors that Mr. Obama is a Muslim, the most appropriate response is a denial followed by: And so what if he were?”

Score: D- (Detached from reality)
Rather than express surprise and outrage that a certain percentage of people are crazy losers, let’s just accept 10,000 years of history and figure out how to minimize their wide-scale impact. Here’s a clue: it’s not by sitting down and gently pointing out that they are crazy losers. Here’s another clue: it’s not by writing about why they are crazy losers on the opinion page of The Times.

Maureen Dowd/The Monster Mash

The Short Version: Obambi II?

In her words: “[H]e will now have to come to grips with something he has always skittered away from: You can’t be elected president unless you prove you’re tough.”

The Score: A (Ass-kicking)
Dowd tells it like it is here, in language that’s clear and convincing. As much as we love Obama for his “effete and vaguely foreign” aura (Dowd’s phrase), we understand that it’s never going to sell to the masses, particularly once the Republican machine gets oiled up.